The impossible gym class filled with fat ladies

“This will be easy,” I thought to myself as I glanced at the decrepit women around me.  “I think that some of them are even in their fifties.”

I had decided to attend a gym class entitled, “Barbell Strength.”  It looked interesting, and I was kind of tired of just working on the machines, so I thought I would try it.  Seeing that I was the only guy, I was beginning to regret my decision.  One hour of boredom coming up!

At 6 pm, 15 minutes late, an extremely skinny lady in her forties walked in and started gathering weights.  “Who here’s watched 50 Shades of Grey?” She yelled.  Everyone but me raised their hands.  “Good, because we’re listening to the soundtrack today!”

I groaned inwardly.  But soon, I was groaning for a different reason.  After about two minutes, I realized that this class was harder than anything I had done before!

It’s not that the weights were heavy, in fact, they were super light.  Under normal conditions, I could have lifted them all day.  But these were far from normal conditions.  No breaks, no recovery, and all the angles were so weird!  What a normal bicep curl was became brutal when it included a curve.  Hopping around while lifting weights also added seemingly brutal difficulty.

After five eternal minutes, another man stumbled in late.  “What’s the matter, Jeff?  Get your toenails painted again?” The instructor drawled.  Despite weighing 90 pounds, she was lifting more than I was!

Twenty minutes later, I wasn’t sure if I would make it, so I looked around to see if everyone else was in the same boat.  A seventy-year-old lady was calmly matching my weight.  A girl my age was lifting three times what I had.  I felt like tipping over.

But once I put away my self-respect, I got a really good workout.  It’s true that I could barely stand the next day, or the day after, but my pain let me know that I was building muscle.  The clock said 6:45, class over!  But no, it went to 7, 7:05, 7:10…  Finally, as people were lining up for the next class, we were dismissed.  I stumbled into the shower, vowing to never come back.  I didn’t sleep at all that night.  But the next week, it was a little easier!

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